As comfortable and happy as I thought I was in my little suburbian bubble, there was always something stopping me from being as happy as I knew I could be…self-criticism.
You know that little voice that tells you you’re not good enough – a good enough mother, a good enough wife, a good enough cook, a good enough (fill in the blank)? Yeah, it was always louder than the other voices in my head that said I was strong, confident, and that I was really making a difference in this world.
For me, the voice in my head was always super-critical about my body. 
Walking by the mirror I would hear, “Ugh. Why are you letting yourself have this huge gut?” meanwhile sticking it out as far as it could go. And then I’d walk away feeling crappy only to catch myself taking a peek the next time I walked by my full length mirror. My eyes would scan down my body and think, “Eww, just look at that cellulite on your thighs. That’s so disgusting.” Why didn’t I just move that darn thing?
I knew I wanted to change, but I honestly didn’t think it was possible, and I certainly didn’t know how I would change my body since I already went to the gym 3 hours a week, and I also loved to run, bike and participate in races. I was no slacker, ladies and gentlemen. Continue reading →
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